Survivin'

I said I'd tell the truth for a lesser sentence. I don't got anybody to protect anyhow. King's messed up real bad and it ain't my mess to clean up. He didn't need to shoot that son of a bitch. He the reason why we're here. Alls I care about now is survivin' and walkin' the streats again some day so I can get paid some more.

More about the trial

 I ain't got no talkin' to do 'cause my lawyer says it's best if I don't testify. He says it's best if I just sit and look "respectable". I saw Steve at the trial and his smart ass scoffed at me. What he thinkin'? When we're out of this mess I sure will get him what's coming his way. That's gotta be done, since this whole thing is his fault.

Trial

Some damn fools gone running his mouth about the robbery. Then, some other fool's reported what he heard about it to the cops. Now we up for trial, all of us, 'cause of that damn son of a bitch. I swear I'll find him and get him what he deserves for this. No man's going to mess with me and get away with it. No sir.

We got paid

We done finished the getover. Best part is, Steve and Osvaldo scrammed so we ain't got nothing to give them from the cash. We got paid good, Bobo and I. Them carton of cigarettes came in handy too. I'm right damn pleased with myself. All's a man got to do to get paid is put his mind to it. Plan things out, recruit a crew. Any fool can ear a decent pay like that.

Getover

The getover ain't gone so good. King shot the store owner but it's okay because we still got paid. We split the cash after we got some fried chicken. We ain't had nothin' to eat all day before that. Word on the street is that people are real worried over the store owner's death. I don't care as long as I got paid. Still, King didn't have to go and shoot no body though. He was on drugs.

...

It's been some time since the trial now. I spend a lot of time on film projects with Jerrry. Who am I? I don't even know. People look at me different. My father's eyes have changed. My mother doesn't understand what I'm doing with my life but she's glad I'm staying out of trouble. I want to look at myself a million times through these lenses to see one true picture of myself.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow's the last day and I can't stand it. I'm afraid and I can't breath. I'm afraid I'll be locked up forever. I can't take that. It's just not right for a guy to be locked up forever at sixteen when all he did was walk inside a drug store and walk back out. Just like that. I wish Jerry were here.

Mama

Mama visited for the first time today. I wanted to hug her and tell her that I love her and that I'm sorry. I miss Jerry. I often worry about how he'll think of me from now on. He's a good brother. A better one than I am, that's for sure. Mama told me about him and the neighbors next to us. She told me about lots of things things I can't remember. All I can think about is this trial. It consumes me.

Monster

Now I understand why so many of the guys in here talk like lawyers. Being in and out of the courtroom makes you think about your case all the time. At least I have this project to keep me busy, but all these other guys ever talk about are cases.

Miss O'Brien says that my case is getting all jumbled up because the prosecutor  lady wants to make me look as bad as possible. She wants the Jury to think of me as King and Bobo. Miss O'Brien says that it's her job to make me seem human in the eyes of the Jury, because I'm a monster. That's what the prosecutor lady called me... A monster.

I hate this place

I hate this place. I HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE this place. Literally, all these people think about is causing others pain. Sometimes I feel like I'll be stuck here forever. And that's when I feel sorry that they've confiscated my belt and shoe laces. I understand now why they do this to the prisoners. They wan't you to suffer through all of this. If I really get 25 to life I'll sure want to kill myself. I really mean it too. It's hell in here.

This Can't Be Real

I wake up in the middle of the night with tears running down my face. I hate this place more and more. This can't be real. I can't stand being here. I want to convince myself that I'm not supposed to be here, that this is all a mistake. One giant mistake. But I know that can't be because each day I find myself more and more consumed by guilt. Guilt for failing my parents and Jerry but above all failing myself. What am I? I want to escape this experience, and the only way I can do that is by continuing with this film. It's the only way I can keep myself sane.

MONSTER

This blog contains a series of fictional posts written by the characters in Monster by Walter Dean Myers. These posts are not a part of the novel itself, they were created by myself for a school project. The posts are reflections of what the characters might have been thinking as the story unfolds and the readers learn about their pasts as well as their inner turmoil.

Briefly, Monster is about a sixteen year old, African American teenager, named Steven Harmon. The novel is told through his point of view in a screen play format.He writes the screen play from jail in order to keep his mind off of the harsh reality of his situation. Steve is placed in jail as a result of his involvement with robbery gone wrong. The men involved are, Steve Harmon, Osvaldo Cruz, Bobo, and James King. The main man behind the crime is King. He does all the planning and encourages the other to join him in the robbery. Steve was to be the look-out during the crime, Osvaldo was to stand outside the drugstore and trip up anyone who would have wanted to walk into the store while the other were inside, while Bobo and King actually committed the robbery. Steve and Osvaldo were more like accomplices. Bobo was the man who took the money from the cash register as well as the cartons of cigarettes while King got involved in a tussle with the store owner, Mr. Nesbitt. Mr. Nesbitt had a licensed gun that he kept in the store in order to protect himself in times of trouble. When he retrieved the weapon, King wrestled him for it and then shot and killed Mr. Nesbitt. Afterwards, Bobo and King leave the drugstore with the money and cigarettes and grab a bite to eat. Steven and Osvaldo did not accompany them and they never received a cut of the profits either. However, Steven is on trial for murder and he might be placed in jail for the rest of his life.

Trial

All these lawyers do is ask a buncha questions and twist and turn everything everythin' I say. The trial left me feelin' confused. I sure was afraid of Bobo though. They better believe it. The fact that I'm apart of them Diablos ain't got nothin' to do with this mess though. They better know that. And the whore had nothing to do with this mess either so they don' have nothin' on me.

Reported

That whore reported me to the cops from the drugstore stick up. Now I'm up for trial. Those fools don't have nothing on me though. They can't get me I have the Diablos backing me up.

The Whore

She ain't got no proof that the baby's mine. She probably gone and slept with all the block. She deserved that beating, that whore. That's right. She's out to make me look like a fool. A damn fool. Well now she knows I ain't no god damn fool. If that whore dares to question me again, well I swear I'll have the Diablos slit her and all her family.

Diablos

Now I officially belong to the Diablos. I cut that lady up good tonight. Left a big gash on her forehead. I done what I had to do and now it's official. Now no one can mess with me or they'll be messin' with all the Diablos.